Zombie Movie Review: Mulva- Zombie Ass Kicker

vector image for mulva zombie ass kicker movie

vector image for mulva zombie ass kicker

Does it count as good, or bad value for money if you buy an awful film but it’s less than 1 hour long?

That’s probably the only thing worth thinking about with this hellhole of a movie. It is truly dreadful in every possible way. And not in a ‘Troll 2’ or ‘Plan 9 from Outer Space’ kind of way, but in a wish-my-DVD-player-would-catch-fire-destroy-the-film-and-burn-down-my-house-in-the-process-with-me-still-in-it awful.

It’s Halloween, and the odious Mulva is getting ready to trick or treat. At least we assume this is correct because it’s quite hard to tell what is happening due to the terrible acting and ‘comedy’ speech impediment this Mulva lass has decided to use throughout the film. From what I can work out she was once picked on in the past at Halloween by some kids and now wants to be able to trick or treat again. She decides to go and do this with one of her friends (a slightly better actress although that’s not really saying much). They go off out on the candy-hunt, meet some annoying people, come across a few random zombies for no reason and some boring stuff happens to them all.

For a film that clocks in at just under 1 hour the time doesn’t half drag. Perhaps its all the cast and crew in-jokes that plague this movie, perhaps it’s the lack of jokes, or perhaps it’s just godawful. No wait, I can add to that list. It’s worth mentioning the acting yet again as it really is atrocious, but I’ll throw in the well below-amateur directing, dire script and possibly the most paltry editing I have ever witnessed (you actually hear the director shout out ‘OK GO’ before Mulva starts speaking on one occasion).

It appears to have been cobbled together by a bunch of mates who discovered they still had 1 hour left on their rental camcorder before having to hand it back and they used that hour to film whatever random garbage came into their heads at that moment.

I’m quite happy to watch low-budget movies as there are a lot of gems out there to be found, but I’m not a sucker. Sometimes bad films are just bad. If it had been given to me no-charge, was just a free YouTube video, or even if I APPEARED in it, it I still wouldn’t be interested in ever watching this. How this ever got out into the wide world is a mystery to me. At least it shows that no matter how inept you are as a film maker you’ll still be able to put it out on a DVD.

And don’t get me started on how Lloyd Kaufman happens to have been roped into appearing…

Gore Score D
Norks Score F
Originality Score E
Overall Score F


3 responses to “Zombie Movie Review: Mulva- Zombie Ass Kicker

  1. Pingback: Feature: Rob Zombie’s Favourite Zombie Movies, Reviewed | Devouring the Zombie Films of the Living

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